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What should we do if our car is stolen? call the police, they usually come pretty quickly.

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What should we do if our car is stolen? call the police, they usually come pretty quickly. funny dank candy meme feature image

I know, that's a lot of information to swallow. The news was so bad, the next day I had to rush to work. Harambe walks into a bar. He orders a drink and a shot. The bartender says "What's the occasion"? Harambes says "I'm celebrating". The bartender says "Congratulations, what's the occasion"? "I'm celebrating my first blowjob". The bartender says "Congratulations, but what's the occasion"? "First blowjob". The bartender says "Congratulations, but what's the occasion"? "First time for me, since I've never had a blowjob"... It's called "The Battered Women's Shelter". To which the man replies, "No thank you. I'm a Jew." Two Jews found the same penny. he is now a seasoned veteran. It's a bit of a long joke.

They don't have any gigs yet. I said "I'm not racist, but what if a black guy said that?" They're just plane wrong. The bartender looks at him and says, "Sorry, but we don't serve minors." ...the biggest difference is the phrase "my dick", no matter what. They've got a lot of experience in bed. Not sure how I'm going to take it away from her. I just don't know how to feel about it.

...but I was only in it to get shitfaced. A group of businessmen decide to buy a farm, but they don't have the funds so to get one they go to the market and see only one interested seller with a pig. "I'll take it for half," said one. "I'll take it for half," said another. A few hours later they come across another seller who has a parrot, "This one's a bit more expensive, I'll take it for half," said the second man. After a few more hours they come across a third man who has a parrot, "This one really does look like it has a mind of it's own," said the first. "I'll take it for half," said the second. "I'll take it for half," said the third. After a few hours more they come across a fourth man who has a parrot, "This one is very special, this one has a mind of his own, he has a mind of his own the parrot can talk," said the first man. After a few more hours they come across a fifth man who has a parrot, "This one has a beard, this one has a head", said the second man. After a few more hours the men come across a sixth man who has a parrot, "This one has a beak", said the third man. After a few more hours they come across a seventh man who has a parrot, "This one has a beak", said the fourth man. After a few more hours they come across a eighth man who has a parrot, "This one has a beak", said the fifth man. After a few more hours the men come across a ninth man who has a parrot, "This one has a finger", said the sixth man. After a few more hours of waiting, the pigs walk out of the barn and the men walk up to the barn door and ring the bell. A little girl opens the door. "Hello, bitches and bastards, may I come in? I'm going to take a pig for a dip in the river... I'm taking the bank and I'm not returning until later." She was having a mid-life crisis. He says "I'm Jesus Christ". Because you don't want to crucify yourself He was playing tic tac toe with me. He was a real boxer A lawyer and a young boy are sitting next to each other on the plane. The lawyer is furiously working on his briefcase. The boy asks him, "do you know if you can give me one good reason why you should be paid more than someone else?" The lawyer thinks about it for a minute and then says, "if you're not paid enough to be considered a good reason, then you're not worth much".

Because they're a little meteor Because it was non-knee I would be a millionaire. A man walks into a bar, and the barman says, "What'll it be?". The man replies, "Gin, and tonic". The barman asks, "Why so casually?". The man replies, "It's a drink." She looked surprised. Row row row row row your boat It was a real eye-opener It's 10/10

A train Everyone came. You should've seen her face! There's twenty of them Because they can't even. I don't know how I feel about it. It was a shit zoo Dunno what pisses her off more, that I was with him or that I was with her. It's the only way he can get a dick down

The real joke is in the comments. I replied, "I don't know, but I don't like the way you look at it." Because they are trying to get you in on their pyramid schemes. But I'm still working on it. He went out in a blaze of glory He was assessed and he had diabetes. So a man walking down the street sees this dog and he goes, "Hey! What's that?". The dog says, "Nothing". So the man walks down the street again and sees the dog and he goes, "Hey! What's that?". The dog says, "Nothing". So the man walks down the street a third time and sees the dog and he goes, "Hey! What's that?". The dog says, "Never mind that, get that salad". ...not sure why they're called amnesia pills.

Author: Photo of author Raja Suarez Raja Suarez
Published on June 8, 2022
Tags: jeffrey dahmer hacker space arm dust taxes

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